Tudung,Tudung labuh , Sekolah agama. Tapi...

Aku confuse. Lepas duduk asrama baru aku kenal orang.

4 types aku jumpa. Xpayah ckp siapa. Cuma aku learnt something je...

Aku xkata typical ,semua ada perangai yg aku akan ckp ni.Segelintir... Cuma dtg dari perempuan bertudung and bersekolah agama, mengejutkan & kelirukan aku.

Type #1

Sekolah agama dari form 1 sampai la form 5. Masuk kolej, bukak tudung...Former classmate tanya kenapa dy changed mcm tu skali? Jawabnya, Ni mmg diri aku, korang yg xkenal aku..
waduhh2..


Type #2

Pakai tudung labuh, tutup litup. Sopan. Ckp lemah lembut. Bila kawan terkuat kan suara, tegur..Sms kat kawan2 mesej keagamaan.Suke pg majlis agama. Bagus sgt.(Aku pon x la baik mcm tu..) Mlm2 text 3, 4 org lelaki. Hari esoknye, cerita kat best friend A to Z tentang semua lelaki yg di text pd mlm harinya dgn excited skali sampai Si Pendengar setia tu, panas telinganya. (Nasib baik la bukan aku.).. Riak dtg dari dirinya kah? atau sk dy yg girl's school only. Mcm baru sehari dua dy nampak kaum Adam kat muka bumi nie..
Excited semacam bila ada org bercakap, pandang , and nak2 lagi sms dgn dia.. Mcm ni perempuan tudung labuh, sk agama?? Yg aku kenal, bercakap dgn lelaki pon kene ada penghalang, segan, and mengelak dari bcakap dgn lelaki kecuali perlu ( ni yg aku tgk sendiri, budak sk agama). She's older than i am tapi, i dono HOW i should respect her? Perlu ke???

* My suggestion, cabut tudung labuh, pakai tudung biasa. Sbb image tudung labuh ni put a sheen yg prmpuan tu pious n pure. And i found u are none of those.


Type #3

Pergi surau hari2, tudung labuh, sk agama... baca Al-Quran, sukakan bacaan berunsur keagamaan , CD ceramah agama, semua yg keagamaan la. Yg aku hairan, time bercakap dgn roomate la kn, sarcastic, nak marah, mcm kita ada menyakitkan dia. Pd hal manusia2 di sekeliling dia cuma bertanya... Kami bertanya elok2. Pelik2....Time bercakap dgn geng2 surau, elok pulak bahasanya.. mugkin, we're not good enough kot, just to talk to her, we have to be as pious as her..adoi la kakak...xpaham2. Kalau bercakap mengenai kebaikan org lain like, " cantik la dia tu kan"..Dia akan ckp, " alaa bukannye bla bla bla".. mesti ada dia nak sangkal jgk. Tidak kufahami. Bukan ke kalau solat jemaah hari2 kat surau, bace Quran hati dia jadi lembut and baik and suci murni semua.. knape mesti ada sangka buruk & xpuas hati? Kalau bercakap mengenai sesuatu la kan, diri dia mesti dipuji jgk, kalau x dia tanya. " aku? aku?"


Type #4

Sk agama. Suka mencarut.. Seronok je aku tgk dia cakap... Kalau dpt mencarut dlm English especially ( dono what she thinks) depan public, lagi dia bangga. Apa yg bangga dgn mencarut kat public. Org pandang rendah n serong kat kamoo ada la...


Hopefully aku xjumpa dah org2 yg ironic mcm ni. Give sk agama and tudung labuh a bad name. Tudung labuh isnt just an image, it is a responsibility to show pureness in a girl.

Fashion & Tudung

Aku akui tudung skg ni mcm2 jenis ada. Cantik2 , colourfull, menarik, da bomb! semua pon ada.

Aku pon minat. Semua girls pon sama... (Ramai org pakai so aku tau la)

Tapi..... pakai tudung mesti kene tutup bahagian dada..Agama kita cakap.. But, ape yg aku nampak, selalunye, kalau yg pakai selendang tu. Bhagian dada selendang kamoo x tutup pon??? ( bukan kamoo xberbaju). Cuma selendang yg kamoo lilit2 kat kepala tu, length dia x sampai pon nak tutup bhgan dada.Ada yg pakai bhgn belakang pon singkat... Panjang selendang tu babe, tapi dada x tutup. Tu bukanlah pakai tudung bagi aku. Tu bungkus kepala namanya.. Haish.. lagi aku xpaham...

p/s : Aku bukan girl in tudung labuh,bersekolah agama. Aku perempuan biasa.Aku xnak la jd org yg cakap , nant aku sendiri yg buat. Nauzubillah....

Couple

COUPLE

Teens mmg suka title ni i bet. Mmg pon. kalau tgk kat mall, pasar malam , sekolah , xyah cakap kat mana2 ada. Skg budak 8 taun dah pandai couple.(tergelak aku bila i found this out - dari surat cinta budak dajah 2)

Dgn bangganya tulis kat facebook in relationship with ___.. kan3? haa da kantoi..

I know it is something wonderful that make u feel inspired, motivated, complete and a brand new person and all. I been through it once. It is not a bad thing, it is a gift.Do u know LOVE is one of God's greatest gift selain dari keamanan, rezeki, kesihatan tubuh, akal.. Iman is the greatest gift of all. Tp byk couple skg atas nama LOVE, buat kemungkaran mcm....issue buang baby, premarital sex..eee semua ni salah! u give LOVE a bad name.

We, especially to Muslims la, patut tau our limit.Agama kita ckp jgn dekat dgn perkara2 yg mmbawa pd zina.Aku bukanlah alim sgt ke, perempuan surau ke ape, hehe..cuma aku tau limit yg digariskan agama. Nak ckp aku baik sgt xla pon. I act based on what our religion taught us.

I admit, i had a bf long ago.(now i positively think it's puppy love . yah . confident!)  Aku pon kapel masa aku hingusan dulu LOL. I was sincire. tp the guy wasnt kot. Dah lain2 agama, what was i thinkin kan? the good thing is, walaupon kapel dgn mat saleh christian, aku still jg batas aku. Dia mmg agak liar. Aku dpt wat dia hormatkan aku selama dia dgn aku. Mcm tundukkan KING COBRA tau. Fuhh! Pengajarannya, walau dgn sapa pon, kat mana pon, syg mcm mana pon, jaga limit agama..or else, ur gonna get in trouble...u know what i mean kan?

Cuma curious dgn budak2 skg ni...


Questions...

Jumpa bf / gf via texting or online. Bole percaya ke? Kalau xnampak muka n berjauhan, atuk 70 tahun pon bole mengaku 17 adik oii (im writing this in 2012, my advice google him/her - works for me!)

couple atas betul2 suka ke, sbb nak top up ke, sbb rupa yg cantik n handsome ke, atau org lain kapel, kamoo pon nak kapel jgk? Bangga bila ditanya, kamoo bukan solo tp ada bf or gf. Atau nak buat list ex gf or bf masing2?.

Advice...

You'll  never find the right person if u dont let go the wrong one....

Guys yg sweet talker, jgn percaya la dik, dah kat 1000 perempuan mereka ckp ayat yg sama, semua cair.. xkan kamoo pon nak jadi rapuh mcm mereka. nak ke lelaki yg mcm tu? kalau masa couple pon dah xsetia, dh kahwin apa lg. Jgn, just simply say NO & reject this kinda guy..

Bagi aku selagi xjumpa insan yg betul2 ikhlas n ada chemistry, xkapel pon xpe. xmati pon dik... idop je. sihat walafiat. x payah nak desperate cari kapel, dah desperate sgt, org yg unemployed, kaki ponteng, kaki apa2 je la kamoo bole amik jd bf ( for girls). jangan.. we girls are way precious. Biar je, org lain kapel , kamoo xkapel.. apa yg kamoo ada?, maybe 4 flat dlm tangan, a good job, and stable life ( bg yg dah keje la)...Kalau dh mcm ni, xyah cari, petik jari je, ramai lelaki BAIK, SOLEH, EDUACTED, PERFECT sebut je la apa2 berduyun-duyun akan kejar kamoo.



Lg satu, do not play with other peoples feelings. Remember, karma; what goes around comes around. Kalau suka terima seadanya, kalau xsesuai, or xsuka or apa2 je, jgn biarkan she, or he, waiting or wondering mcm la dia tu pengemis. She or he might get hurt by ur decision, tp kalau kamoo xnak dia, jgn teruskan till he or she dah like u so much, susah nak break the news to them. Stop while u can. Tolak dgn cara baik. Jaga hati mereka yg syg / sukakan kamoo. Stay friends, or at least appreciate them well, as good as they appreciated u.

Sharing biar la bertempat. Learn what to give, what to protect. If u want to share your happiness, sadness with him or her, that's something TO DO in a relationship. Sharing is caring kan? What NOT TO DO is, kalau belum ada ikatan sah, by the religion and legal means, xpayah la nak share lebih2 ( u know what i mean). Girls, respect yourselves. Boys, do no treat a girl like some kind of clothings. U like it, u wear it, then, when u dont need it anymore, u throw it away to the trash bin as if it is some useless rags. Sharing the joy and the pain together tighten the relationship.


Control what u share with him or her.U dont want any trouble after the break-up. ( i read newspapers , watch tv. u know what im talkin about)

Do not ask, just give and take.DO NOT DEMAND .Materialistic person isnt an ideal person to fall in love with. What it means is, If she or he give u something which u didnt ask for,say thank u and let him or her see that u appreciate it. Anything that is given without u asking it, comes from the bottom of da heart and given sincirely, which is BEAUTIFUL! Even it is just something lame like a hair clip! Give sincirely. U give him/ her like 99% love. Maybe, just MAYBE he/ she loves u 95% back ( u gotta admit it, before ur married to him or her, there's a lot of temptation. Maybe she / he admire someone else, maybe he/she is with u only bcoz of certain factors, many many MAYBE.unsure). My point is, what u give , u give it honestly, sincirely, no lie. And if he or she dumps u, IT'S THEIR LOSS to lose someone like U!

When u like/ love somebody, show it, let em know. If ur in a relationship, tell ur partner how much they mean to u. Dont forget the 3 words. Often. Cakap je jgn sentuh! Showing love not only by physical means ok! ( like kiss and etc!)..Xbole sentuh ok! susah sgt ke nak faham rules. (muslims).It is important for them to know. U buy gifts, a car, a house! maybe, but u forgot to tell em how much u love em. Kinda waste..

Do not rush into marriege. My advice to students especially. Kalau yg buat diploma tu, get engaged ke dulu, habis degree baru la bole get married. In my opinion, a woman, should have her stable life first before getting married. I mean, finish your degree, get a good job, have a stable income, stand on your own feet firmly, then, if u have the love of ur life waiting for u, yeah u can get married!.. The reason im saying all of these is, we donno whats gonna happen in da future and all. Death do us part, divorce , stuff like that. Just be prepared women! We dont wanna be the damsel in distress...dependant and weak. Life isnt a fairy tale ok! nor a bed of roses either.. Lets say, he dies, or u both get divorced, u have ur own job, income, ur stable. U can build a new life. No worries. ( Bukan mintak bercerai-berai sumer, just be prepared.)


Kahwin muda??? im voting a big NO if u ask me. Why rush?.Berhingus lagi. Jodoh xkan lari nyer. If u are meant to be, destined to be with him, u have a lifetime to spend with him. U may get bored LOL (haha jokin ) . What's the rush??? .Marriege is a huge commitment and big responsibilty. Youth comes just once. Study, graduate, get a job, enjoy ur teen ages, and when it is time, and u r ready, give a " Yes" to the one u cant afford to live a day without .spend the rest of ur life with him.Da stable sumer , baru la bole live happily ever afta.. Mcm tu baru la betol!

True story...

Masa PLKN dulu dlm surau, time nk tggu isya' . Budak perempuan bercakap2 pasal kapel kt belakang aku.Aku terpasang telinga. (Dh xde keje..) . Soalan dy, " Eh, bila pakwe ko start sentuh ko?" " Aku masa form 1" (Dia yg tnya, dia jawab)... Dgn bangganya perempuan tu tanya soalan mcm tu. Aku ingat aku ni yg salah dengar. tp betol la. Mmg perempuan tu tanya soalan tu pd kawan dia. Ceh, pakai tudung tutup litup, dlm surau tanya soalan mcm gitu plak. Perempuan tu bukan perempuan free hair ke ape. Yg pakai tudug elok je. Terkejut jgk la mula2.. Sbb aku x exposed pd semua mende mcm ni dulu. So lesson learnt is, perempuan pakai tudung pon xley caye dah skg nih... kalau dh kapel tu , bangga, cerita bila bf dia start sentuh dia. Seram!!!

Rules...

1. A special relationship involves 2 person, my rule is, when one of the 2 buat hal, ( cheating, ignoring, harass) the other one is free to decide the relationship goes on or off whether the other likes it or not.
2. U both are still strangers before marriege OK! do not share pin codes, passwords, account no, or anything important. He or she maybe important in your life that time, what happens next, we never know. Watch it!
3. Treat ur bf like a husband? I saw my friend did it. Like u know, ask permission, bow when u passed by him ( like u do to ur granpa or ur dad) . Crap! what is that??? Hello.. kapel je baru.. xkawen lagi. Syurga istri bawah tpk kaki suami bukan tapak kaki BF yer...
4. Be yourself, u are still u, just in relationship. Doesnt mean u have to ask permission from ur bf or anything. Thats just disgusting rubbish . Mengarut.
   

Nak kapel, kapel je la. Aku tahu girls semua diciptakan Allah cantik, istimewa, kalau xdari segi rupa, byk faktor lain yg membuatkan kamoo tu sgtla precious nye..Ramai lelaki suka. Then, tersebutlah kisah mereka, kaum Adam tu nak berkapel dgn kamoo. Mmg fitrah la, kalau ada org suka, mesti kamoo pon rasa suka juga . Lepas tu ,kamoo pon berkapel la. Dah kapel tu, pandaila jaga batas agama.. tu je. Jaga diri and maruah kamoo.. Ingat girls. Put yourself di tempat yg paling tinggi. Imagine yourselves as a rare diamond , yg hanya tinggal satu je lagi kat bumi ni. The last one . One in a million. U are soooooooooooooo precious, priceless, and only one guy yg bertuah je yg bole miliki kamoo. Bukan semua, bukan calang2 lelaki bole sentuh kamoo. Jaga la diri tu. I am a girl ,so aku nak jaga la saudara seagama aku. Dulu zaman jahiliah, women xde harga, jadi hamba, x dihormati, mcm toys je. Bila Islam dtg, Rasulullah letakkan wanita kat tempat yg tinggi. From zero, to hero. Rasulullah s.a.w penat2 angkat martabat wanita zaman Jahiliah dulu, skg kamoo nak balik ke zaman tu balik ke? Dgn rela hatinye kamoo bg bf kamoo pegang tangan kamoo. Nak pegang, sentuh, semua tu hak suami kamoo, bukan bf yg xtentu lagi ntah jadi suami kamoo ke tidak tu ye wahai minah2 sekelian...Sedar la selagi bf kamoo tu blom jd suami kamoo, he's nobody, a stranger..

Aku harap adik2 junior or kawan2 bole dpt benefit dr post ni. Aku bukan nak tnjuk baik atau pape, IM a MUSLIM, aku just tolong nasihatkan ape yg aku rase pelu.

Best Friend??? (Part II)

I Have one page telling u guys cerita " tragis" aku dgn girls yg bergelar best friend dgn aku..There were 3 ( before college)

WELL, aku nak cerita another sad story of mine.. yeah.. im not ashamed of it bcoz it teaches me the most precious lesson in life..hopefully it teaches u guys a lesson as well, like it did to me. x semua friendship indah mcm dlm tv...duhh ..wayyyy different if u ask me. So if u have someone beside u ( male or female), WHOM u call best friend, pls appreciate him or her because we dono what we have till it's gone kan? in this case, him or her is gone. Yeah so...


Best Friend #2

Namanye Hani.She was my classmate la masa drjah 2..Ala, mase tu mana rapat pon just satu kelas. i didnt even care about others. All i know was, my parents sent me to school . id be home at 2. And my dad fetch me.. I had no idea WHY i had to go to school LMAO...( i turned out good ok..)

Kami start rapat Darjah 5. Darjah 6, we got into the same class.She was so excited i got to the same class she's in... She got even more excited when i had to move places. I sat behind her.. Ok.. I was the tall type girl yg Sape-Tinggi-Duduk-Belakang type tu ... i hated that. Boring.. sape tinggi duduk belakang. suke hati aku la nak duduk kat mana2 pon! haish.... i hate that stupid rule..

Anyway, i revealed the fact that she only likes to be friends with smart, good-looking , Cool individuals ONLY when we were 16! I took 5 years to realise that! i was so naive arent I?

Here comes the story..

I never really liked her or ever wanted to be her friend. It all happened by accident. U see, we accidently became good friends bcoz of a television series. Yeah! ( No. this isnt crap)..think i catch another lesson.

• Friendship based on a television shows don't last long. LOL.Well it is true isnt it? I have evidence, testemonials ! ( if u need any)

CHARMED. 3 sister witches, supernatural powers, Book Of Shadows, u know...if u watched Charmed yeah. We were immature that time. Aku pon xtau la mcm mana kami bole dgn tidak matangnya nak embrace those 3 characters in our lives.. whatever ..budak hingusan. Darjah 4 (still hingusan ke?)..
Pada saru hari, masa cikgu xmasuk kelas, kami pon mengarut sama2.. I sat with my other 2 friends. "OK sape nk jadi Prue?" For a sec, i was gonna say me! me! But i didnt really think Prue's telekinetic power was cool. I thought Piper's power to freeze time was wayyyyyyyy cooler! So i was 'PIPER' . Im so glad i was. In fact, i love it till today! Piper's great!!
We were deciding on Phoebe. Hani walked by our desk. Believe it or not, it was my fault that we had her for PHOEBE! sorta..yeah i admit.( sorry)..i kinda " invited" her and she was like "yeah. ok" ..duhh . That was how it all started. In case u r wondering who Prue was, her name is Hariezah ( she is the eldest sista in real life & a protective one too) just like Prue huh? =D...i was ok with her. She even went to the same college i went to.

This Phoebe sticked with me through my top years till high school. She was indeed a good friend. But with expectations. She wanted to be my friend bcoz i was good. (Not showing off but, im telling what really happened here, ok) We were in the same class till form 3. We studied hard and scored 8As in our PMR ( oh she was still my friend then bcoz i got 8As maybe) . Read wat happens next. Prue? Prue went to a boarding school. I got the same UPSR result as Prue but i wasnt accepted in any good, elite, brilliant, excellent ( u name it) boarding school. i have somethin ( A LOT!) to say about this later....

Form 4, we still in the same class. I went through something really tough that time. My first time break up with my Aussie bf. ( Now I think it is FREAKIN STUPID. WHAT WAS I THINKING?!) ONLINE bf that was. Philip. ( 2 years relation, give me some credit! it wasnt easy as others, as we are from two different worlds! ( He's Christian).
Well if u ask me, i was 16, what did i know? i was a complete, whole, brand new person when i was with him! i liked that guy so much ( i guess). I couldnt help myself to be very sad, devastated bla bla bla..( u know better; all the feelings after a break up). Hani, = Phoebe was my 'very best friend' right? She didnt care. i was really sad. At least she could do was pull me up when i was down right?. I mean that's what best friends do, thats what they are there for. Arent they supposed to be there through the highs and the lows? Am I wrong? Tell me if i am...

What she did was, she took advantage to go upper than me. Beat my reputation and all ..She was good. TOP 5 student. I was in top 3. what happened to me? I was almost in the bottom 10! almost! She ignored me like I was nobody to her. I was glad she made such a reputation. She wasnt that diligent before.I admit i have my weaknesses. She used to ask me right after Math period, " ko faham x" always... She didnt do that anymore... I need her, she had been my Math tutor since, i dono form 1. She was patient , she was OK before. She accepted who i was before..it all changed. I wasnt mad or jealous she was getting good, in fact i was happy for her. But i was just sad bcoz she changed... She changed to be an arrogant girl. She wasnt like that before. She didnt befriends with me anymore. She befriended with Math Geniuses in our class that time; Insyirah, Farhana, Azreena, geng2 yg duduk belakang line kami.. Ala mmg terasa sgt pon. Bila pandai, top 3 , orang hormat,bila dah jatuh kawan baik sendiri pon x ingin nak dekat. I thought, i mean, i knew she was embarassed to call me her friend anymore. Dy kan dh ada kawan baru, geng baru. Sape la aku... betul. i wasnt trying to be dramatically tragically terasa. But i was truly madly deeply terasa dow.tp x kan la aku nak tunjuk kat dy aku sedih kan? aku biar je. Dia pon dh xheran apa2 pasal aku. It is not my statement. it was hers . I still remember when she told me " i dont care about u anymore"... What kind of best friend is that???? i wanna know..

She deserted me as if i was a retard o somethin. the one that she was embarassed of. Dulu kawan dgn aku ok je. skg malu nk call aku ni ex - best friend dia kot. Dia berkawan dgn Faten, Azreena, Farhana & Insyirah la. Org2 yg aku sebut tu. X peduli dah aku ni wujud ke x. Seriously, sampai aku depressed & result pon turun..

Kalau time add math, dia akan jauhkan diri dari aku. Aku xbuat2 cerita ok. Ini apa yg jadi 3 tahun lepas. Terkial- kial la kami kami yg x baper math ni. Suam2 kuku nye student ( math je ).. Cikgu Math aku baru tukar mase tu. Bidang dy modern Math. Kami kene hadap SPM masa tu so, cikgu tu pon kejar masa. Dy bg priority pada budak2 yg excellent la. Kalau budak yg suam2 kuku, pggil dy during grouping add math, she'd go to budak2 excellent dulu.. last2 baru la pg kat kami yg suam2 je ni.

• Kalau kureng sket, layanan diberi adalah second class [ lesson #2].

Nak tau dgn lebih lanjut? Let me tell u more. Kalau kita kurang pandai in something, ape2 je la study ke, arah jalan ke, kita bertanya kan? That was what i did. Nak harapkan cikgu tu, cikgu tu pon x menang tangan nak pegi meja ke meja ajar kan? So aku tanya la Hani and budak2 yg genius math tu. Hani xpeduli pon nak ajar aku mcm dia ajar dulu. Dulu dia ajar sampai aku faham.. Masa tu dy dah pandai da nak tengking2 aku, wat muka bosan bila aku tanya. Redha je la. Mungkin ada jenis manusia yg lupa deeds yg kita penah wat kat dia dulu. Aku naif sket kot. Aku ingat semua org baik hati kalau kita bebuat baik ngan dorg.
Tapi masa tu, bila aku tanya, mcm aku ni pengemis tau, mintak duit dgn dia. Dia ajar nak xnak je. Tapi masa English, baru la nak menempel dgn aku, mersra2, nak bincang sama2..Nampak sangat....Time Add Math, kalau tanya budak yg paling pandai, ( i wont say who) she's gonna say, "kejap ea kejap.." sampai habis period math pon dia x ajar ( wat2 lupa).. this is a true story. Kalau dgn geng2 brilliant dorg, tanya je ajar terus. that girl is brilliant, she's doin medic in russia now. 11As. amazing huh? But, to me her manners, nope. Nothing amazing about it. I learnt the word DESCRIMINATION through her acts. through their acts.

Climaxnye, incident yg memutuskan line BFF kami was mase Chemistry period, form 5. Our Chem teacher asked us to do calculation. Aku xsure topik apa tp ada calculation la. Alahai2.. aku ni da la xpaham apa yg ckgu cakapkan kat depan. Cikgu Kimia sk aku sorang je.. knape la aku x masuk SBP ke, MRSM ke...Aku xsure la mcm mana nak kira. Kimia kan kene guna electron valence la, mass la, no of mole la, formal charge la (oi ni dah matrik) . My point is, kene consider mcm2 kalau nak calculate. Aku xtau nak guna yg mana satu. Aku tanya Hani. " Nak kira soalan ni kene guna apa?" .She answered me, "guna otak"...Soalan aku kasar sgt ke? menyakitkan hati ke? Aku salah tanya ke? Setahu aku, aku cuma tanya mcm mana nak solve calculation Chem tu je kan? Dia anggap aku ni budk idiot yg xtau pakai otak dah ke? .Ibaratkan dia nak ckp kat aku mcm ni, " what u got in ur head? artificial brain? " (aku rase tu la yg dy nak ckp kat aku moment tu) ..i did realised she was getting snobbish with me day to day.. what can i do about it? Nothing. That was the new her. I still remember masa i was a top 3 student, during in the lower form, she always like, didnt get her howework done,  sleeping in class during gap, ( she was active in KOKO) duhh . I generously  gave her copy some of mine so she can finish em up. I thought that was the right thing to do. Considered she was my best friend kan?. i was sooooo naive wasnt i?

Aku redha je kalau dia da malas nak ajar or study sama2 dgn aku lagi. Tapi obvious la dia hanya nak kawan dgn org2 top 5 je. So aku ni bukan sape2 dah la kan?.. Lagipun rezeki dia mencurah2 masa form 5. She was blessed. Maybe tu yg bwat dia lupa diri.

1. She got a bf who loves her
2. Jadi penolong ketua pengawas
3. She was in the "IN" group/popular?
4. Budak2 "pandai,genius,excellent" jd geng dia
5. Teachers loved her
6. Masuk group pelajar target masa tu (spm)..[ni pon nak bangga diri ke?]
7. she was a happy, whole person yg xperlukan sesape dah kot masa tu
   

Dia xkawan dgn aku dah, Najiha jd best friend dia kot lepas tu. Pg balik sk dia amik giha..kelas malam semua.. Ni la kisah kawan yg lupa kawan. Did she ever knew what a friendship means?? I bet friends just come and go je bg dia kot. oh, sorry, friends yg bukan top scorer..sbb dia cherish kawan2 dia yg 'EXCELLENT' tu semua.So, memory dari primary school sampai high school bole buang mcm tu saja kan? I accepted it long ago.. I'm just sharing here. Sombong2 dia dgn aku, sama je result Spm kami, xkurang xlebih..Sama...Janganlah ingat Allah bagi rezeki sikit, awk dah rasa hebat sgt. Maybe Allah tgh uji awak dgn kepandaian & kegembiraan awk miliki masa tu..Awk maybe disanjung oleh semua, tp kawan yg salu ada kat sisi awk dulu dh ilang respect & timbul rasa benci , sedih dgn sikap awak.I'm glad i can share this dlm blog. hopefully jd pengajaran buat semua yg tgh ada best friend, or yg dah lepaskan best friend korang...

Best Friend???

Kawan Baik

Im sure we all have somebody, male or female, that ur very comfortable being around with right? ..Kita semua ada best friend...yg pegi cafe makan sama2, beli hepon sama2, ponteng kelas sama2, beli baju sama2 etc..semuanya nak sama..BFF la katakan..

But here, i wanna share with u all cerita sedih aku dengan mereka2 yg aku kenali sbg best friend, atau lebih mesra dgn panggilan " backstabbing snakes" .

So here are my stories..

Best Friend #1

Masa aku 8 tahun, my parents amik aku back to their home after 7 years aku dibesarkan kat kampung by my grandparents( my granny died) .

Mula2 duduk bandar, aku jadi shock sbb aku kan KAMPUNG GIRL.Mana biasa dgn idop bandar...sk kat bandar. Mula2 masuk kelas, aku xde kawan sbb dowg sume kate, takut ngan aku sbb aku ni ganas la, sikit2 nak pukul2 kawan, marah2 kawan...( yeke?? sori kpd sesiapa yg berkenaan) ntah. ye kot. huhu. Aku dah biasa dibesarkan bagai anak tunggal.So, i didnt know what tolerant was.LOL.Masuk darjah 3, that's when my story begins...

Aku jumpe seorang kawan. Namanya Ashikin. Still hingusan, suci, bendul ,naif, murni.. u name it. Dia sgt baik dengan aku. She was the one who broke the ice. i didnt know how to.We did everything together. Like sisters. i dont have any sister so thats y we were close. I never had a best friend before, she was the first one. I remember she was very very nice to me. She taught me math too...I was bad at Division..Masa ni la aku kenal best friend tu apa.

Naik darjah 4, kami masuk kelas 1st! waaa bagus3! The betrayal begins here. Pd suatu hari , masa English period, teacher wat spelling bee test mengejut. Like " keluarkan a piece of paper, teacher sebut, awak eja" . Aku pon cuak , i was like ," Alaa cane ni, aku xwat revision pape pon" . Shikin pon sama...

Surprisingly, words yg teacher bg tu semua aku tahu eja.. mcm '"RESPONSIBILITY" "HEADMASTER" " GRASSHOPPER".. Aku cuak sbb ingat teacher bg ayat ke, proverb ke. I was kinda relief, and happy tgk teacher tulis jawapn kt blackboard. bcoz i knew i got it all correct... Nak tau ape jadi?

Marking time.. "Tukar paper. Awk mark yg kwan awk, kawan awk mark paper awk".. So Shikin pon marked my paper.. Obviously....hahahaha..OK..

Dlm kegirangan sbb aku tau aku dapat 10/10, aku tengok dgn excited paper aku yg Shikin tanda. I was shocked! 5/10... aku nampak pensel kat tangan dia & pemadam dekat dgn pensel tu..aku bole nampak kesan padam pd paper aku.OBVIOUSLY, aku xpayah ckp, u readers tau kan apa yg jadi?..

The best part of the betrayal has yet to come...

HERE COMES THE BEST PART!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Aku tanya la " ko padam yg aku eja kan?" . She answered " x la. mmg ko eja mcm tu. Baik ckp, ko tiru ea? " Aku ckp " xpon, mmg aku tau nak eja semua perkataan tu". In fact, i wasnt lying. I did know how to spell all the words. She thought i was cheating o somethin...She was the one who wasnt prepared for the test & didnt know how to spell those words. Aku sgt x puas hati. The best scene... i headed to the teacher's table and told the truth. The teacher didnt believe me.. Shikin dipanggil. QUESTION & ANSWER session with da teacher... " Awk padam ejaan dy ke?" ( what a question la teacher) Mmg la si Shikin tu jawab x..adoiii ...Dia tanya my former classmate masa darjah 3. The boy told the teacher that i was the top scorer in the subject back then. Nak tau x Shikin cakp ape kat teacher aku? This was her line ; " Masa teacher bg jawapan kat papan itam dy byk salah . Dy suruh sy padam yg salah tu " I was FREAKIN SHOCKED!!. Aku xsangka a BEST FRIEND bole ckp mcm tu... i learnt the hardest way..

First lessons in life,

1. Frienship is wonderful
2. Betrayal

I cracked n cried. i didnt care. semua org pandang. Jd issue.. i cried bcoz the teacher didnt believe what i said. i felt like she was denying all my hard work to be so good in the subject. Maybe u readers think it is just a small matter, a spelling bee. But at that time, for a 10 year old, it matters A LOT! It mattered to me for the teacher to see what i could do... to gain her trust, and convince her i was one of the best and all.. it mattered to me! She ruined it all. My very own best friend... kids can be cruel. See, what a 10 year old with an incredibile ability to lie could do to u?? She won that time. My teacher percaya ape yg Shikin ckp. Aku yg suruh dia padam ejaan yg salah pd words aku eja. YEAH RIGHT!. Did u find any mistakes Shikin? Oh u couldnt find any, could u?. So that was why, u grabbed a pencil, and made it "right" for me..Did u?. Thanks a lot for letting me see who u really were. Do u know that she never admit what she did?!. Yeah till today! thank u so much! i was 100% honest when i was her friend.

Tapi orang terinaya Allah tolong kan... Apa jadi?? Masa i was in Standard 6, teacher yg sama mengajar English. She saw me shines. Not just spelling bee , some essays...lol .She saw i could write essays and scored in exams or whatever sheets she gave us to do. And she was convinced that i was telling the truth & knew that Shikin was the one who had been lying 2 years before. Teacher tu jd teacher kesayangan aku sampai la skg...

Losts

im new at this. but id like to share things. i wish i'd be heard this time...

lately, i feel like im alone and my voice doesnt matter to anyone. coz it cant be " heard" and it is sad. ive been through a rough week this week. history that i went through 3 years ago is repeating itslef.

3 years ago, i lost my best friend. now i think i lost another one.

Best Friend#3

Amalina. She lied to me about a lot of things,frequently. and i knew it. i kept forgiving her eventhough i knew she was lying. Bcoz i thought, she might had her own reasons to lie to me. i kept giving her chances coz she's my best friend. Days to weeks and weeks to months, months to years..

till it's 2 years now, it breaks my heart when she didnt realise that i knew she was lying about things, it breaks my heart that she might think i am a stupid that she could easily play some tricks to get rid of me without me figuring it out ! fun huh? but guess what? i knew everything! Lies catch up with u! she lied to me about the new laptop, about her bf, where she was studying, what she does..everything.. i mean, what do u get from lying to people? lying to me, your best friend?! at least, ur ex-best friend.

we met 2 years ago when she moved back to her old school.she couldnt stay at her boarding school for her medical conditions. Her spine. That was where i was studying, completing my high school year. we had one thing in common that time that made us bonded as friends.

it's her break up. her bf broke up with her, on her very birthday, he sent her a card, and they broke up. the thing is, he has been adoring Amalina's bestfriend, Amira . he was just using Amalina to get to Amira. i felt sad for her when she told her story. Surprisingly, i went through the same thing. my Aussie bf walked out of my life. Since then, we shared our joy n sadness together. but now it's over. it is bcoz of lies n more lies. plus ,it's the lies about guys that i cant stand about!

now that we're 19, she broke up with a guy and told me that he's totally out of her life. But then she went out with me one day, carrying a new, cute purple purse. i asked when did she buy that adorable purse, she said, "He gave it to me, the guy u hate most".. i didnt hate the guy then. BUT she was the one who told me he lied to her ..sort of cheating her with a girl in KL? .
WHAT happened? she hid things from me too i guess..i only hated him bcoz he practically lied to my best friend, Amalina. i had nothing against their relationship if the guy didnt cheat or lie to her o anything.. unfortunately, he did.. sorry dude, i was a protective bestie.. yeah i was!

I liked being friends with her. We did everything together like sisters, she always came over my house and we gossiped about everything! ( typical, thats what gurls do yeah guys sekelian..not mengumpat, we talk abt our hal) We went out to the mall.Makan kat fast food restaurant over n over.. Buy the same mobile phone accessory, share songs, talked abt boys, watching movies like in da cinema ( from lappy je)...Plan to go to the same college.Semua la.I did everything yg i didnt get to do with my previous 2 besties tu..(x yah ingat pon xpe)..I have a lot memories with Amalina than i had with the other 2. I dont have any sista so i liked my bestie being around. But not lately, im uncomfy if shes around. i dono who she is anymore..

I saw she did the lying to show that she's a fabulous person somehow? wow SHE CAN DO THINGS ON HER OWN! dUHH we're 19! ur not that fabulous. Kalau 9 year old go out town alone baru la aku amazed ... Like once, i was out to bandar alone. ( My bros/bodyguard wouldnt wanna go). Then she texted me she was kat bandar too. In a cinema, watching horror sorang2...Yeah right. That was another lie , lie to ME. Then, bila jumpa aku kt PizzaHut, dia cakap sori lambat dgn kawan tadi, dy yg lambatkan aku. Dengan kawan, tadi cakap sorang2...Next, dia duduk la sama makan dgn aku coz we were starvin kan. While eating, ada phone call. Dia jawab. Yeah org dlm phone tu tanya la. Kat mana? Jawabnye, "kat pizza tgh makan..sorang2 la.. pegi tgk movie sorang2, makan sorang2..haah.." Yeah yeah yeah... nape la suka tipu org.....

One more thing, worse, she did the lying when we hang out with other friends; and there's nothing i can do about it. i was just like supporting, anything she said bcoz i didnt wanna embarass her in front of our friends. She didnt thank me or anything. She just acted like it's nothing and id forget about it. Just like that! I did feel so bad bcoz i had to lie to my friends. She didnt explain to me why she lies. I guess i was right. She was just havin fun. Poor gurls that im talking about are friends, those who live nearby the neighbourhood, Shahira, and Zakiah . Well, we live nearby each other's house. so we made a call, and an assembly haha..but that's not the point. The point is, Shahira constantly asking the same question, which Amalina had answered her over and over, different times, she still asks the same question everytime we go out together. " Amalina belajar kt mane skg?" . I think Shahira knew what kind of person Amalina was. She knew that there was somethin fishy .She was suspecious.Maybe I was the who had been fooled and blinded... To the extent, i think that's one of the reasons her best gals ( she had a group) sorta ditch her... i dono , u tell me..

i wish she didnt lie to me.. i wish she realised that i am not a stupid that she can lie to when she pleases.. i gave her chances. many chances . to fix herself.. she just threw it away.. i dont trust her words anymore. i dont call liars like her a friend. i dont need such friend. she was a very nice girl. but i dono who she is anymore. I guess she's changed. her changes include being more secretive and untrue to me. it is sad that i had to eliminate u from my life Amalina. u were my best friend. in fact, the best friend ive ever had... i tried so hard to spare our friendship from what i got to go through with Hani, my ex bestfriend. but u ruined it all by ur lies..that's terrible. u know what people say, " what goes around comes around". karma. u lied to me, u lied to ur dad (yeah ive seen it!) When Faiz lied to u, u cant really blame him u know.... u should think about that! ASK URSELF WHY!