Monday, August 9, 2010

Most beautiful song i've ever heard.. .



I've always LOVED songs; which are dedicated to women, like 'a token of appreciation song'/ for her, the angel song' . I have a few favourites but this one atop all! Maher Zain - For the Rest of My Life...I fell in love with the song the first time i heard it...waaa..




Before this i have my personal favourite;
  1. Shyne ward - Breathless
  2. Con Ella - Cristian Castro ( Spanish)
  3. My Baby You - Marc Anthony & byk lagi la


Tp ni semua Western nyer...





I've found somethin ISLAMIC but totally diff! 

Yg ni best . Check out la.. Muslim yg abt to get married ke, married ke. This is for women. Hmm.. i wish there'll  be someone who's gonna dedicate this song to me  in da future oso hehe...Actually , it is exclusively  for wives la rasenye. Lantak la.. It's soooo beautiful and it moved me..So sweet maa..


 think this is the most beautiful song with most meaningful lyrics..Yeah it's Islamic. And i think it's what i been searching for..Indah giler words lagu ni.







 Here are the words....
 
For the rest of my life - Maher Zain







I praise Allah for sending me you my love
You found me home and sail with me
And I`m here with you
Now let me let you know
You`ve opened my heart
I was always thinking that love was wrong
But everything was changed when you came along
OOOOO
And there's a couple words I want to say

For the rest of my life
I`ll be with you

I`ll stay by your side honest and true
Till the end of my time
I`ll be loving you. loving you..

For the rest of my life
Thru days and night
I`ll thank Allah for opening my eyes
Now and forever I, I`ll be there for you
I know that deep in my heart


I feel so blessed when I think of you
And I ask Allah to bless all we do
You`re my wife, and my friend, and my strength
And I pray we`re together in Jannah
Finally now I've found myself, I feel so strong
Yes,everything was changed when you came along
OOOO
And there's a couple word I want to say

For the rest of my life
I`ll be with you
I`ll stay by your side honest and true
Till the end of my time
I`ll be loving you,loving you...

For the rest of my life
Thru days and night
I`ll thank Allah for opening my eyes
Now and forever I, I`ll be there for you
I know that deep in my heart 

And now that you`re here
In front of me, I strongly feel love

And I have no doubt
And I  sing it loud, that I`ll love you eternally

For the rest of my life
I`ll be with you
I`ll stay by your side, honest and true
Till the end of my time
I`ll be loving you,loving you...
For the rest of my life
Thru days and night

I`ll thank Allah for opening my eyes
Now and forever I, I`ll be there for you

I know that deep in my heart...


A song about love & 100% Islamic themed = Perfect!

It's time for you to listen to it too.. hehe..

video 


It is dedicated to us, Kaum Hawa, women, wives (to the married ones), so hope we all like it!

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Is it true that.....But WHY???

Ive been through this question again and again with different individuals  as i grow older, day to day LOL.. and i been wondering...

is it true that, when there's a slight different between 2 people, it  can draw a huge boundary between those two even though they were once best of friends, a couple,( maybe) or even siblings? They could draw a line and make a gap just because the other have some weaknesses he/she doesnt?

i mean person A is a bit richer, or smarter, or prettier will forget person B who's lack of those quality? Person B may had those good quality before, ( times they were with one another, but he/she has been a little off track  in the process that makes these 2 are no longer with the same qualities). i dono if i can put this straight hehe...

Maksud aku... betul ke, even adik beradik, kawan baik sejak lahir , or lover ke sesape pon, akan lupekan kita kalau kita ada kekurangan?

Because based on my experience, betul je.... knape ye? sedih aku ase bila fikirkan hal ni...tapi knape bole jadi? knape possible?


story #1

Punye la kawan baik, kacip, kamcing, ape lagi? ada chemistry, no rumah same, tarikh lahir ( no pertama) sama, umur sama, pe lagi? sekolah, kelas, semua sama...bak kata pepatah, ada chemistry kaw kaw r...Person A ni pandai, cerdik, nerd, top, everest! sumer la.. Masa ni person B lekat je ngan person A, tapi bila Person A dah start merosot, Person B pon x nak mengaku kawan, and geli nak kuar or duduk satu group ngan Person A dah, just because Person A dah x top, everest, meletop, gempak mcm dulu, Person B putuskan persahabatan yg terbina masa zaman pakai pampess lagi..mengape yer???



story #2

Big Family person A (relatives), dulu masa dia blaja pandai, telefon bila dah abis UPSR,PMR, SPM, nak tau result nad nak puji melambung2..nak suke, nak bawak makan, BBQ, cuti sana, sini...blikan presents, sambut kalau balik kampung,salute mcm menteri,letak label budak pandai dlm family..wow! sonok! Bila person A dah x ok bila masuk college, tanya khabar pasal Person A pon x, pasal Family Person A pon x! waaa what a nice nice family...tgk person A mcm two different persons dgn person yg mereka puji melambung dulu.. Mengape yer? orang tu sama je, cuma result exam dia saje yg x ok...why they draw a boundary bcoz of that. isnt a family has to stick together no matter what? mengapakah?


Story #3

Person B, classmate Person A lama dah, dulu tabik giler kat person A, tanya Person A tu ini, mcm internet bgerak... Bila Person A dah turun carta dalam kelas, Person B pegi geng2 ngan Person C lak.. naik carta la mereka berdua. Bila person A tanya something yg dia kurang arif pd person B and C ( yg stick together gether tu,) sorang jawab xtau, sorang jawab, " adoi, ko dah kelirukan aku la..ckp ngan ko je aku jadi bengong" wow! yeke? Alangkah jauh bezanye dulu dgn skg. Dulu Person B and Person C hormatkan person A. Nak tanya soalan pon dtg dekat n segan2 tanya.. Bila keadaan dh berubah, xbole ke mereka layan pertanyaan Person A mcm Person A pernah layan pertanyaan mereka dulu? Ape yg lain nye skg? Person B and Person C diangkat darjat jadi agong ke? sampai Person A pelu menyembah nak tanye soalan?


Story ku pulak...

Aku ada seorang kawan . baik la jugak. lelaki. satu kelas. Form 1 sampai la Form 3 (sahaje huhu..).Kami pon berjuang sama2.. Form 1 sampai Form 2 setengah, aku mendahului dia. Kami bersaing nak dapat tmpt top 3 dlm kelas. Forn 3, budak ni lebih advance and determined. Sbb da nak PMR kan.. so akhir form 2 dia mmg top ,kalah la aku dah..  tp xper.. still dlm top 5. Dlm ke-top-3 or top 5 tu, dia mmg jadi geng aku. Kami ada geng...( so lame) budak nerd ske blaja punyer geng la.. Ada 3 pompuan 2 lelaki. ntah aku pon da x ingat...Tapi aku ingat la manusia2 nyer..Masa dulu dia kagumi aku ( knape?) sbb walaupon tulisan buruk bole pandai HAHAHAHAHA lawak2! ske ati la tulisan mcm mana pon.. janji aku paham n homework siap.  We were both competing ntuk jd the best masa Form 3. Dia jadi kawan baik aku. Telefon la mase bday dia,
( sbb celcom kan ada birthday bonus huhuk)... Ckp pon ngan aku, mengumpat lagi la ngan aku. Hobi budak ni kalau x puas ati, cari geng dia, mengumpat. Aku la yg dengar ape2 dia x puas ati. Aku tau ape masa tu? aku dengar je kih3... So aku pon jd pendengar yg baik la.. kami pon kawan still. dah geng kan? pegi kuar pon sama2..Menjelang result PMR, sah2 la dia mendahului aku.. Dia budak 9A straight. Aku 8 je.. kalah la satu A..
Makan kat secret resepi 3 orang. Dia blanje. Ayah dia bagi duit asenye for achieving the 9As Masa dia dpt tawaran SBP, klaka la... huhu..Dia tepon aku. Tanya, " ko ada dapat surat ape2 x" aku jawab la " xde pon". Cube cek mail box, check intenet la. Dia tggu la kat tepon tu..huhu..Aku x dpt pon tawaran ape2 aku bgtau dia." Aku xske...isk3..(nanges plak kawan aku dpt SBP)..aku nanges ni" LOL..aku mcm nak ketawe je..Aku ase aku dah terketawe dah masa tu..ntah la..Sumer org nk masuk SBP dia nanges plak. elok la kan? " Aku xsuke..aku nak tau ko dpt sekolah mane.." Ala ala.(.kih3 ..lawak la.).Mula2 mmg dia xsuka pg SBP. Dah pegi lain pulak citer nye ngan aku.

Masa kat SBP, aku paham la..mane ley pakai phone..nak pakai pon sorok2..dia salu la masa mula2 dulu, telefon, borak, borak masa bday dia..cakap sampai sakit jaw LOL ..xtahan tol la sorg ni...Dia mmg mcm tu.. baik ngan aku kan3? dulu je...Dah dapt result SPM dia senyap je. sbb dia excellent 10As. Aku kureng dari dia. Dia xcall la sbb nant org kata dia berlagak pulak..Aku call dia n i was very happy for him, he'll be flying to the UK!. Dia wat A level n aku wat matrik..Masa awal2 matrik , dia ada call mcm bese, tp then jarang2 la sbb A level kan busy...lama2 dah xde dah..mcm tau2 je aku ni camne kat matrik.. Sbb ingat x aku ckp geng ni ada 3 pompuan 2 lelaki. Lelaki sorg laki tu satu matrik ngan aku ( from MRSM).. so reputation aku pon dia tau la.
Si budak SBP ni pon still in touch ngan pompuan yg lagi satu tu ( kan ada 3)..Dia wat A level gak asenye. Dulu satu matrik then dia quit kot. HMM.. yg jadi gap nye, dah jarang2 contact aku tu xpe la. aku pn x contact dia takut ganggu..birthday dia baru2 ni dah xde telefon, telefon kawan2 baru je kot..Kat facebook pon kalau ditegur mcm suam2 je jawab. xpe la, aku dah bese..kalau kita xde something yg dia ada, then wujud la gap, aku ngan dia dah x sama taraf...dia pon da xnak berkawan ngan aku.. level study lain2, kawan pon dah luper.. why? werent we good friends dulu??? Knape aku cakap mcm ni? Sbb ngan budak perempuan yg wat A level, and lelaki satu matrik dgn aku dari MRSM tu elok je dia keep in touch with, cuma mengelak dari berkawan ngan aku je. Aku ckp because it's true. and it happened. Just lately..ok.

why...??

Bg aku pandai ke x, samua kawan... Kawan r  precious to me .. Sometimes bila kita ada something yg kita nak share tp xley share ngan family atas sbb tertentu, kawan ada... kalau nak mintak tolong dlm study bole tanya kawan...knape ada diskriminasi bila kawan jatuh satu tangga dari kita? knape wat gap antara kita ngan dia?

i still remember, those who helped me with my mathematics.( yg bwk manyak trouble to me!). aku ingat jasa mereka walau sebesar zarah pon, your help  still considered a big help for me that time, and i'll never forget these people yg tolong aku solve math questions dulu..

thanks to UZAIR Zulkifli ( i think thats his name)yg sblm trial math PMR , bawak aku pegi library duduk kat line blakang skali, semata- mata nak ajar aku , utk aku score paper 1 math. Semua pandang semacam sbb sorang pompuan sorg laki je duduk kat belakang buat math. Aku cuak dibuatnye. aku wat2 muke ok and fucos je ngan ape dia nak ajar aku. lantak r org nak pandang ke, cakap ke..Ape yg Uzair wat, dah wat aku score paper 1 MATH trial! thanks Uzair. I'll never forget ur deeds to me.

To syafiqa Zuki, sebelum dia pergi MRSM, dia ada ajar aku sampai ( aku ase smpai dia tension huhu) aku bole wat equation lol.. dalam surau masa form 4.. aku tau mesti dia agak tension but thanks!

Mizah J, and Mizah H who sanggup ajar aku Add math yg menyeksakan masa "kelas tahanan add math petang" form 4 form 5.

Shikin HUSIN yg sanggup duduk wat math ngan aku. (  mereka2 ni x malu pon duduk ngan aku kan?).Aisyah Nadzar pon...

Qamar Zedy, yg aku nanges kat dia,sbb ' THE GENIUSES' just ignore us. and wat math sama2 mase saat genting nk paham Function!!!!

Ain Afifa, masa standard 5, and 6 setia je ajar math, masuk SBP still kawan ngan aku, Skg ni pelajar accounting, xpenah pon lupa aku. Aku kenal dia darjah 3, 4,5,6...x de pon dia nak malu or abandon aku like someone did....

Thx to these people..who never changed no matter how i am...they dont give me the "why" they should be friends with me, and dont give a big "why" for me  to remember their names.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Biology & me


Buku ni buku rasmi Budak sains hayat kat Matrix aku.

I bought the 8th edition, just like the pic.

It's like and old boyfriend of mine..

Wanna hear somethin?

I tell u what...

Long ago, when i was a child, i wanted to be a doctor. My dad works at the hospital. ( no, he's not a doctor). And sometimes, he brought me to work. I dont remember for what reason, but i think bcoz i hated the nursery / preschool that he put me at that time.I didnt like my mom going to work every morning. What i did? I screamed and cried. She couldnt go to work. And if they left me at the nursery, they would turn the car back, coz i was inconsolable if i started to cry that time. This was at the earlier phase when my parents brought me living back with them. I threw tantrums all the time.I could melt ur ears by crying 2 to 3 hours? No joke.. U wouldnt wanna be my babysitter lol..If i didnt like somethin, i got mad, I annoy all people by crying. I couldnt make any babysitter cope for more than a week with me except for my late granny.

So, as my dad frequently brought me to the hospital.I developed a liking. I like the smell of the medicine, wards, ( huh?) i like to see doctors, and believe it or not, i like hospital! I mean it wasnt my favourite place to go, but everytime i go to the hospital , it invokes the feeling that id like to be there one day. Yeah. i wanted to be a doctor. That was my ambition.I like everything about being a doctor, hospitals, syringe, the smell of chemicals when u walk in a hospital. I liked it a lot. My uncle, my mom bought me the doc toy set. I broke em, they'd buy me a new one.When i was 13, my mom was admitted. And i had to study for my sciece paper. I brought my SC book, and did my study in her ward. It felt so good, so real! Studying sc in a ward ( topic senses, body systems) It worked! indeed. It flows into my head like runny water from the tap..i felt like a doctor lol

And i worked hard during junior high to get to the science stream later in form 4. I made it. Even before i sat for my PMR, i went to the POPULAR bookstore with Hani. I saw the thick Form 4 Biology reference book. I was so into it. Like the feeling of liking your bf..something like that. " Biology, here i come". I said that to a book! . Did i tell u i was a nerd? Yeah i was. The sticking with books and homeworks, messy, naive one, know nothing bout whats goin on around me except for going to school and get a good grade? Yeah, that was me. I was busy studying to be a doctor! Leave me alone! haha. That was then. This is now. Things changed. Changed a lot!


Learning Biology in senior high, those 2 years were heavenly. I was one of target student for Biology. That didnt matter much to me. What i want to point out is, learning/ doing something that u r keen about, feels so good! Doing what u wanna do and be good at it, what else could u ask for? It felt so right! u know the feeling U WERE BORN TO DO IT feeling? Yes that was it. I been wanting to do it all my life and when i get to do it, i do it well. Sweet memory!

This all changed when i was in Matrix. I got into matrix bcoz of my Bio result. Coz if compared to other sc subjects..Nahhh..nope, not qualified. That was all Biology's doing. So, in matrix, it was different. I wasnt that good anymore. Neva got an A. B and B+ costantly. I had a C! thank u very much. It got a lot details, with the mechanism, names, classes ... Yeah, i read, tried to make notes. Matrix was too fast wow! I still like it, but a little less. Not like before.

I found that there was a lot to handle. And i got things out of hands many times. I was stuck with math tutorials that i didnt know how to solve by myself, Bio to read, Chemistry to memorize.. OH my GOD! i hate a fast track studies. Plus, lab reports, assignments, presentations ... Umm since my spm Math & Chemistry basics wasnt THAT strong, i confronted many problems handling those 3 subjects. Was there that i realise, that it was a mistake to get into matrix ( u might wanna think thorougly of getting to matrix when ur math & sc basics are weak) 6As spm basics qualify u to get to the matriculation programme, however,  in my situation, only Biology contributed an A, the math and chem, no...I had tough times bcoz of that. i know when there's a will , there's a way.. i tried to work it out with math, but math doesnt seem to like me...that was one big problem! i did go to the lectures, never skip tutorial classes, i dont know WHY i cant understand MATH LANGUAGE. u know when the lecturer taught, " after u integrate, substitute it into the eq  bla bla bla then u simplify untill the factor of ..then when u know ...u choose the right eq to be differentiated ...to quadrant" and i always like, what? what eq? which one? substitute where? to the power of?  how m i supposed to know when im done? how to diff log? it's too extreme for me. heavy for me to carry. Then i thought to myslef, that's it!. i think everyone's ability is different from one person to another, i couldnt take it anymore. Math is errrghh!!

Math traumatized me.During exams, i put Bio as a priority, but i didnt have a lot of time as i had to give my attention to math too. That was so frustrating. You wanna do a science course,  u gotta take the whole package.. And i cant seem to handle one of the items in the package given! I love bio, but sux in math, i wanna do a bio course, there'll be Math tailing me. i know i know.. i can run  but i cant hide. even an ICT course, Nursing. Nightmare..omg !

The good feeling when i read biology was fading away. Every time i read a bio book before, it felt like having a chocolate cake ready before ur eyes, and it's all for u, u know...feels damn GOOD! I still like it, coz Bio is a very interesting knowledge to explore about, just not as keen as before. when i started getting bad at it, it upsets me. I dont feel good doing it anymore. I know it meant so much to me when i was in form 4, it felt like having ur first born, getting ur first laptop, getting ur first long craving for, car... But now, in my head, when there's Bio,there'll be math. i just, i fall apart....sob sob.. Cant i just learn biology? No, math is its #1 ally.. cant separate them. U got an A for Bio, u fail Math. whats the point? ur considered failed...I wanna say, Math entombed my passion for Bio. literally. It doesnt erase my liking reading the book, just learning the 2 together, makes me sick.. forgive me my words. Math lovers out there, ur doin good.. dont mind me..im just sharing, expressing..well whatever u call it..

Hmmmmmm...the doc that  once a little girl  always dream of becoming, is gone. She wants to be a language expert now. Bcoz she finds it a lot more fun,u can learn it from everywhere, by reading, movies, music etc, she can have a life,( doctors dont watch TV ..LOL) , best of all , no math. I think i can live with that. .It's much  fun and flexible. She doesnt have to have contorted eyebrows thinkin how to solve a hyperbolic functions, she just have to think and write! much better.

Guess what, after her times in matrix, she just revealed herself as an otak kanan person whos into reading better that logic. ( that explains why math dislikes her,and she doesnt like math ).. She's not a SC person.It was BIOLOGY who brought her there.
Unfortunately she realised it a little too late. When she couldnt hold on to it anymore, she knew she had to leave. And she did.She took the risk quiting matrix to do a language course. She knew that it was risky, but she wanted  diff thing now, and she went against all odds to get it.She was offered sc courses, two times by the IIUM, and once by UITM.She rejected the offers and applied for the english courses. She also realised that maybe, she have to stay at home for the next 6 months without any university offer, she accepted it. She wants to do a language course by hook or by crook.. and thats that! she'll keep waiting for the upcoming offer, hoping it'd be a language course she's  been dreaming of doing.



BIOLOGY is like my all time favourite song...

it never bores me..i dont listen to it often like i used to, but everytime i listen to it, it pleases me...

It is like a lover that i am not with anymore, but the one i'll always remember, whom  i send the note " I will always love u"   to...

It is like the one u promised to spend the rest of ur life with, till death do us part.

Well. in this case, Math do us part !


THAT'S MY STORY..biology and me...to bio, i will always love u